It was just an ordinary day. I don't have many specific memories on the day itself. It was my short day at school. Basically last year we had an 8 day rotation and one day of each rotation I didn't have a last class. It just so happened this was my short day. I was washing my hands fixing to try to get my work caught up. The phone rang and as I glanced at the number of just said Jackson, and I remember thinking I may need to get that, that it might be the agency. If you know anything about our wait they never called and we never heard from them without us calling first, so that thought was out of left field. Anyway when I answered the phone it was our adoption specialist. She told me that there was a birth mom who had chosen us for a baby born the day before and wanted to meet us the next day. It took a minute to gather myself and be able to think. You come to this point of thinking it's never gonna happen for you, and then out of the blue you get this phone call telling you it's finally your turn. She told me placement could be as early as Thursday and when I had time to gather my thoughts to call her back. I went for my room bawling my eyes out. My friend Emily who was an assistant in a nearby room was at her door and I was bursting so I told her. She was like don't tell your husband you told me first. I went and called Jimmy just praying he would answer. Between tears I told him we had a sweet little girl. He didn't believe me. Not at all. All he could say was "is she serious Ashley? Is she serious?" (She later told him she would never be that cruel). Then I called my dad, who told my mom later that I scared the day lights out of him. I called him at work, from work, bawling my eyes out barely able to talk. Yeah I scared him. So I had to notify my principal that I was fixing to take maternity leave with very little notice, but there were a few friends I wanted to be sure heard from me first. I went to my friend Robin's room who I carpooled with and half beat her door down. Literally. I was pounding on it. Remember we had had family medical emergencies that week so she thought someone was dead. She finally realized which call I meant I got and started crying. Scared a
few more friends and finally got my principal. I know it was dangerous to say anything since anything could happen. But I couldn't help it. So anyway word spreads quickly at work and people were hug fun and congratulating and asking questions. Questions I couldn't answer because I literally couldn't think straight.
I couldn't even remember the names we talked about. I think my most favorite memory of someone hearing was I was talking to our music teacher and one of our PE coaches walked down the hall and said what's going on but before I could answer she heard me say "yeah she was born yesterday" and started jumping up and down going "yay you have a baby!" And started planning and listing everything I needed and what she had for me. My mom screamed and told the rest of the family.
So anyway he last hour passes and we headed home. Thank God it wasn't my day to drive. I literally couldn't think straight and was on the phone the whole way. Called our specialist back and got some details including the name they were asking us to keep. The only name I could remember was Abigail. I couldn't figure out how to mesh Abigail with Alicia when my mom said "what about Alicia Grace Ashley? This is a grace filled moment." That's when I remembered our other name choice was Allie Grace and I was like that works we can call her Ali Grace if we want. We finally get home and Jimmy and I talk it out and I tell him what I know. Nerves abound. My favorite phone call of the day was our pastor and his wife. I called her and told her we needed to talk to them together and away from their kids. They had been outside working in the yard. So she got them inside and went in a separate room and put us on speaker. When we told them she said "I'm doing jumping jacks for joy". It was a lot of tears, a lot of phone calls, and a lot of uncertainty. Some of the other details are kinda blurry or redundant but we were so excited and just in unbelief.
This is the day my life changed. There would be a bevy of emotions later when the reality of my excitement was someone else's pain. But for this day my heart soared. On this day in my heart I became a mom. I loved a little girl I had yet to meet.
I'm not sure how we slept. Between the excitement and being so nervous about meeting her birth mother the next day, I'm not sure how we slept at all. But we did. This will be one of the best days of my life. To think that just a few weeks before we thought we would not be placing with a baby but moving to fostering and not adopting. We had given up hope and thought that we may not ever be parents. And just when we gave that up, just when we chose to move on, we were blessed with our sweet girl.
Like momma always told me... "Hope springs eternal".
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